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Dating Tips, Advice & Resources To Find Your Perfect Match

It’s easy meeting girls in college – they are all over the place! Bars, parties, the library, the dining halls, and football games.

They are everywhere.

The fact of that matter is that school is very conducive to meeting women. And that makes the process of getting dates much easier than it normally would be.

But what happens when you get out of college and enter *gulp* the real world?

While in school, you have a number of activities, sports, clubs, study sessions, and all types of other social gatherings to help you meet girls, once you’re out of school, your life will typically consist of two things:

Work and home.

You wake up, you go to your job, and then you go home, eat, go to bed, and repeat everything the next day.

The transition to entering the rat race after college is done can be depressing for a lot of men, because their lives become entirely centered around their jobs.

This means that the pool of women they have to choose from is limited to thewomen they meet at their jobs, or the women who live close to them.

And whenever your options are limited, that’s NEVER a good thing.

The key to meeting lots of great, high quality women after graduating from college is to keep being as social as possible, and don’t let your life be consumed by your job.

Here are some tips to help you meet women after college:

TIP #1: Use The Internet

This should seem like a no-brainer. Online dating is great for men who are too busy to go out and meet new girls. So you should always be using the internet to meet new women. This is probably the fastest and easiest way to meet girls.

TIP #2: Get Out Of The House

I’ll admit, the last thing I want to do after a hard day at work is to go out somewhere. But ultimately I do, because how else am I going to meet people?

It’s important to make time for your love life. So at least once a week, make sure to spend a day out of the home with the intention of meeting women. You can go on a date, or out anywhere with the intention of meeting women.

TIP #3: Take Advantage Of Errands

No matter how hard we work, we still have to do things throughout the course of our daily lives. Whether it be going grocery shopping, or taking your suit to the dry cleaners, there’s always something we have to do for ourselves.

When this occurs, don’t just rush to get your errands done. Take advantage of opportunities when you see them! After all, lots of girls have to go grocery shopping and drop off clothes for dry cleaning as well. So if you see a girl you find attractive while running errands, take some time and meet her!

TIP #4: Happy Hour

The hour before work starts and around the time work typically ends is a great time to meet girls – if you’re in the right place! In the morning, it’s coffee shops women go to for their morning cup of java. After work, it’s the bar with the cheap drinks.

Go to these places at the right time, and you’ll find tons of women just hanging out, waiting to grab a drink before heading home. Use this time to your advantage! Women L-O-V-E to be social in both these places.

TIP #5: Throw Parties

In college, a great way to meet girls is to throw a party and invite them over. Well, that doesn’t change after you’re out of school. Throwing parties is a great way to meet new people!

Organize a get together somewhere, make sure there’s plenty to eat and drink, and invite everyone you know to show up. And have them invite everyone THEY know as well!

Being the “Party Guy” can really score you a lot of points with girls who are looking to have a bit of excitement in their lives. And it can be a lot of fun too!

Tip #6: Pursue Your Passions

Don’t let work rule your life. Continue to pursue your passions. If you like college basketball, continue to go out to games. If you like live music, continue to go to concerts. Whatever it is you enjoy, go out and do it, and while you’re doing it, meet as many women as you possibly can.

After all, chances are there are some girls who share your passions! And what better way to start a conversation than to talk about something you both love?

The worst thing you can do is just spend all your time working and watching TV. That won’t get you anywhere. Just take action, get out of the house, and know how to start conversations with women.

You’ll get better, and once you do, you’ll find meeting women in the real world is easy and fun!!!

The world is full of people who have to deal with relationship challenges. Some of these problems are more common than others, and there are three that are probably the most common. The first is a fear of intimacy with someone else. The second is the fear of change, and the last is fear of abandonment. No everyone has to deal with these particular challenges, and for a lot of us, they don’t all happen severely, but almost everyone runs into the relationship challengest at some point in their lives. This article will explore these three common relationship challenges and tell us how to deal with them in the long run.

Dealing With Intimacy

Intimacy is an interesting concept to each of us. From a very early age, individuals generally strive for independence. As we progress throughout the years, we are naturally drawn to other individuals that we would like to share intimacy with. Inside each of us is a battle, a battle for who we are against who we may become. While we do want to share who we are as people with someone else, we do not want to jeopardize losing ourselves in the process. If we feel, at any point, that we are giving too much of who we are, we may become uncomfortable. We may pull away and refuse to allow ourselves the opportunity of getting close to another. It is then that we have experienced the fear that is associated with intimacy in a relationship.

Being Afraid Of Change

Getting into a new relationship means we’re suddenly dealing with a whole lot of new things, and these unfamiliar things can feel pretty threatening. Our partners are new to us, and we realize that their likes and dislikes aren’t the same as our own. They have different values and different ways of dealing with things. While no one wants to upset their partner, it can be a real challenge to deal with these challenges gracefully. Some people drag their feet and try to stick to the known, but that can be really detrimental in the long run.

Abandonment

Nobody wants to be alone. The challenge of accepting levels of intimacy and the difficulty of adjusting to change are both pretty small compared to fear of being on our own. Once we’ve made it into the relationship and are comfortable with the way things are, it can be easy to fall into the fear of abandonment. After all, there’s always the chance that the relationship won’t work out. If our partner is unhappy, stressed, or just not the right fit, things can go wrong. Even if there’s nothing wrong, sometimes we become afraid that problems will crop up. This leads to an unhealthy level of attachment and real problems. Fear of abandonment can wreck a relationship if it’s not dealt with.

How To Overcome These Problems

The bad news is that we will likely face the challenges specified here to one degree or another. The good news is that there are some steps to overcome these challenges. If you want to build a healthy relationship and live a life of contentment with your partner, following the steps outlined below can assist you in that endeavor:

1. The first step that you can engage in to overcome common relationship challenges is to know and understand that it is in our nature to experience certain fears and issues that may put a damper on our relationship. We come from a lifetime of experiences that has taught us that having fear can be healthy in such a way that it allows us to be cautious when making decisions and also when working with others. Simply accept the fact that you may encounter these challenges, and commit to working to overcome them in a productive manner so that the relationship is not challenged any more than it has to be.

2. Next, you need to make sure you trust your partner. Trust and communication are the most important parts of getting through any relationship challenge. After all, if you’re not willing to tell your partner what you’re thinking, there’s no way to deal with the problem. Learn to express who you are and what you’re feeling. This lets your partner learn about your needs, wants and fears. You don’t need to suppress emotion. You and your partner need to learn to talk things through and deal with them rationally, instead.

Conclusion

There are things that all of us are afraid of, and sometimes, these fears interfere with our relationships. All the common relationship challenges noted here are caused by things we fear. Taking the time to learn about what’s emotionally challenging to you and how to work around them will help you have a happier and healthier relationship.

The basics can really put you way ahead of other men when it comes to flirting. As I wrote previously, turn taking is of utmost importance. Now let’s look at the content of you are speaking!

There are rules that you’ll need to know. And as it were, most men don’t know them! Knowing them is important, as you’ll avoid much a lot of pain that goes into failed flirting.

It’s not so much the content of what you are saying, but rather the delivery and it’s tone. For example if you drone on negatively about a certain subject, you are bound to eventually drive someone off.

It’s a simple mistake, and understandable. We live in a culture that celebrates cynicism to an extent, so people tend to embrace it. Overall, a little goes a long way though. Avoid that in your conversations, as you’ll bore her and she’ll get fed up with you.

Other ways to make a conversation boring are as follows:

Preoccupation with yourself. If you talk about yourself constantly, and show no interest in others (particularly her!), you are definitely going to have a short run.

Superficiality – talking only about the banal, telling hackneyed jokes or stories. This reeks of shallowness, just like the stories.

Being tedious – Talking too slowly, pausing too long, and taking too long to make a point. This is common, as people try to appear calm and smooth in their interactions. Remember, there is always a balance.

Too passive – just refusing to take part and leaving the conversation on the other person.

Lacking in enthusiasm or interest – this would include being monotone, showing no emotion, and refusing to make eye contact. This will quickly ruin your chances.

Being too serious or somber – There are times you NEED to be serious, but you need to be able to shake that off and clown around sometimes. If you don’t do it, your conversation might abruptly end.

Too excited – you jump all over the place in the conversation, get sidetracked from the original point too easily. This will drive the other person nuts, and it’s generally a good idea to learn to reign this in.

So what IS a good thing to say? Aside from avoiding the above issues, there are a few things you can do. The first is to keep on the topic, and allow for turn taking. The second is to do your part in gauging the conversation, keep a positive attitude, and make it fun! Being fun is a huge part, and you can talk about almost anything!

Another thing to look at – compliments. They can be good, and are usually most welcome. However, you CAN go overboard. If you do, the situation is recoverable though.

If you do pay a compliment, be cautious of the nature of it. You can convey attraction without having to resort to vulgar or intrusive compliments. If you know the person, you can judge it better, but be aware of this issue.

Keeping it simple, and saying something such as “You look gorgeous”, can go a long way. Going further than this can cause offense or embarrassment. While that is not always the case, it’s a gambit that might not work out. Make sure to look her in the eyes while doing this – looking anywhere else could be potentially bad.

As well, while commenting on a woman’s appearance, remember that there is a time and place for everything. One of the biggest mistakes you can make is the timing your compliments poorly, as well as an other flirtatious overture.

Always be aware of the flirtatious overtures you are making. Sometimes it is obvious – you’d want to avoid saying something to someone who just lost a loved one, for example. But there are other times, when it’s not so obvious.

A good rule of thumb is to think about it in neutral terms. In other words, would you compliment a man in the situation? Would it seem appropriate? The same would apply if it was a woman. Keep it within those boundaries, and you’ll do fine.

While compliments are just a small part, they are important, and when used right will propel the attraction, instead of destroying it.

Pay attention to yourself during a conversation. Take notes too, if you can. Look for the rules mentioned above, and make sure to correct yourself after it happens. Eventually you’ll smooth things out.

Coming up soon, I’ll show you how listening is another important part of your conversational skills,

You have her talking now, right? Good! Here’s another important part of flirting: the act of taking turns!

Here’s a situation that is common – a guy is talking to a girl he successfully opened, and the conversation just sort of ends. The guy doesn’t know exactly why. So what happened?

It could be a bunch of things, but perhaps the most common mistake that men (and women) make is lack of recognizing the tempo of conversation, and that they need to take turns. The vocal inflection of another person will indicate WHEN it is time to talk.

Too often, people who are frightened of speaking, when finally given the chance, will tend to blabber like there is no tomorrow. Understandably so – it’s NICE to have someone paying attention to you.

But true rapport and conversation isn’t like this. And after time, a blabbermouth will eventually run people off.

In a recent article, I wrote about vocal signals, one of them being the change in intonation when finishing a sentence, indicating it’s time for the other person to speak.

I’ll say this without hesitation – you really need to learn these signals. You can be the most eloquent speaker on the planet, but if you don’t let people get a word in, you might end up despised by others.

On the opposite end of that, you can end up being worse – the guy who puts ZERO effort into any conversation, making the other person do all the talking by showing no interest.

Either of these situations is bad… and if you don’t pay attention, you might end up AS one of these guys!

So how do we avoid this? By allotting equal time for each person. You should speak the same amount of time as the other person.

Most of the time, a pause is a sufficient signal. But it isn’t always the case. In the earlier articles I wrote about in the nonverbal section, there are some nonverbal cues that will allow us to see when it’s time.

The first is eye contact – the woman might glance away while finishing the sentence. As well, there is the matter of rising and falling intonation – an intonation change will indicate, as well, that they are finished speaking. Listen also for a drop in volume at the end of the sentence – it’s the final clue.

So we have these cues: length of their turn, pause, intonation at the end of the sentence, eyes turning away at the end of the sentence, and a drop of volume. If any of these happen in combination, it’s usually a good sign that it is your turn to speak.

When you are taking turns, try to get EQUAL lengths of time between you and the other person. The end result? You will come across as a fantastic conversationalist!

Soon, I’ll write about the actual WHAT of conversations – what you should actually SAY when speaking to another person!

Many women have the same problem. Your boyfriend who you adore just isn’t into kissing. It is really hard for women to deal with this because it makes us feel unattractive and hurts our feelings. Kissing is very important to women because it tells us that our guys want us and are attracted to us. Here are some ideas for making your boyfriend more interested in kissing.

1. Tell your boyfriend how important kissing is to you and that you would like more kissing with the two of you. Let him know why it matters to you and how much it matters to you. Once he hears this he will probably make sure to spend more time kissing you. You and your boyfriend need to have more than sexual chemistry for the relationship to work, of course. Discuss the need for kissing without making it about your relationship for best results.

2. Think about your boyfriend’s kissing style. Does he give you soft, gentle kisses or are they deep and passionate? Even if your boyfriend’s kissing style doesn’t exactly match with yours, you should not tell him you don’t like it or he isn’t doing it right. He may have had someone tell him that in the past and feel inadequate as a kisser and that may be why you don’t get the kissing you need. You need to make him feel like a great kisser. Pay attention to his kissing style and go along with it. If he gives you a gentle and soft kiss you can turn it into a more passionate kiss by going along with the kiss for awhile before opening your mouth. If he gives you a sloppy kiss and you would rather have a hard, strong kiss than when he is not expecting it give him the kind of kiss you want. He will get the idea about spontaneous kisses and hopefully use different kissing techniques in the future.

3. As your boyfriend gets more confidence he will most likely kiss you a lot more often and he’ll really enjoy it. It is important to give your boyfriend positive feedback when he kisses you, even when he is still working on getting better. The more you praise his kissing skills, the more he will want to kiss you. He will pick up on what kind of kisses you enjoy and you will both be very satisfied.

4. It may be that he has a problem with your kissing style or you just aren’t a great kisser. Talk to him about what he likes in a kiss and chances are he will be more than happy to show you!

5. If you think his nerves are getting the better of him tell him he is doing a great job and you are really enjoying his kisses. That will get rid of his nerves for sure.

6. Not all men enjoy having to be the first to initiate a kiss and it can be nerve wracking for some. Turn it around on him and initiate the kiss yourself. He will love it and you will probably get a lot more kisses after that.

7. You will probably surprise him when you kiss him first but he will most likely return the kiss. Make sure you don’t give up on the kiss – you have to kiss him back in order to keep him interested in kissing you!

8. Make slow and gentle moves when going to kiss him.

9. Look into his eyes when going in for a kiss.

Lets face it, we all want revenge at some point in our lives and you are no exception. Whenever someone hurts us somehow ,its in our blood to seek out vengeance. I remember when my ex dumped me all i could really think of was how i could make her feel the pain i was going through. At the end of it all i learnt a very valuable lesson. Read on to find out what is was…

But before you go and wreck havoc at your ex for hurting you, consider this: by hurting him or her back, you’re stressing yourself out and making your life miserable. If there’s a more positive approach to making your ex feel your pain, will you take it? Here are some ways to get back at your ex without damaging whatever self esteem you have left.

1.Remember that you are worth it. Remember all the good relationships you had in the past? Well they were good because you had something great to offer. Its that thing that makes you a great boyfriend or girlfriend. Dont begin to think that you are not worth it just because your ex did not appreciate you. If you really think about it, its actually their loss not yours.

2. Resist the urge to communicate. Close the doors completely, at least for now. While your mind is in shambles and your ego is almost non-existent, you don’t want thoughts of revenge or what-could-have-been messing you up some more. Remember, in your current mindset, you are more likely to cause trouble by getting reminded often of the way he or she treated you in the past.

3. Take up a new hobby Try to do something you have not done before. A new hobby is ideal because it will keep your mind off your ex.It also gives you the opportunity of making new friends. Think of it as turning to the next chapter of your life.

4. Go out with friends. Share your life with the people you forgot to talk to for the duration of your relationship. Reconnect with family and talk about the feelings you’ve been keeping.

5.Keep a positive mind. Have faith that you will be happy again. Remind yourself everyday that you are special and deserve only the best.

In conclusion, the best way to get revenge is moving on and forgetting about your ex. Start putting these very powerful ways to get back at your ex in action today. Your ex will be green with envy when they see the new you.

No breakups are ever complete without a grieving period. This period is characterized by an ocean of emotions that you will go through as you lament over your emotional loss. If you want to stay afloat and avoid drowning from depression, consider scanning through this guide

The first thing you should remember is that you are not alone. When youre faced with a significant loss, youre bound to grieve for it. In fact, other people are suffering from breakups too and are also undergoing this grieving period just like you. No matter what your style is to cope with your emotions, you will find the following steps beneficial:

1. Allow yourself to be human. There are many emotions that go with the grieving period and you will most likely experience all or a combination of the following: confusion, sorrow, anger or resentment. For you to feel several of them at one time is normal.

Giving your feelings free reign during the grieving period allows you to recover from the breakup in record time. Suppressing them deepens emotional wounds and prolongs the healing.

2. Open your mouth and start talking. Allowing yourself to feel in silence is not as effective as expressing your feelings with others. The louder you are, the quicker your recovery.

Sharing what you feel is a common breakup advice tip given by experts. This comes as no surprise because when you openly discuss your emotions, you are actually able to evaluate them better and get rid of the negative vibrations for good.

3. Learn from your experience. Look at your breakup as a necessary evil to your personal growth. Without the breakup and the grieving period that follows, you would not have been given the chance to get a fresh start in life. Let one saying serve as your guiding philosophy: Whenever one door closes, others will open.

Loss always ushers you into a new phase. How you handle the new phase is up to you. You can rise from the fall, and advance your life if you want to.

There are many tips on the grieving process. These tips, however, will allow you to move in one direction and that is forward. Remember to see the break up as the end of a phase in your life, and the beginning of a new phase in life. If you do this, it will be the best break up advice that you can experience.

In the last series of articles I covered nonverbal flirting techniques, and showed the various ways we transmit our attraction without speaking. Let’s talk about words now!

First, some good news and bad news. The bad news is that women, in general, are FAR better in regards to verbal communication that men, on average.

The good news? When it comes to flirting, verbal communication makes up, at most, less than ten percent of the equation! By that I mean that, altogether, it doesn’t matter so much what you are saying.

Let’s go deeper into this though. You can blow it with words, easily. But you can also REALLY learn to communicate well with them, to the point where you can master it as well as any woman.

The key is to learn to the unwritten rules governing verbal communication. By obeying these rules, you will appear to be more spontaneous, as your conversations will run smoother, but it will take practice.

Think of the situation as trying to learn how to drive a stick shift. You might switch gears poorly at first, as expected. But after awhile, it becomes far more smooth and seems automatic.

If you practice, you will also gain a huge advantage over those that don’t try and learn the rules of communication. Most don’t realize the importance, which is a shame, as they tend to sabotage and frustrate themselves.

The rules are pretty simple, and they govern certain areas. Let’s look at the first area, which happens to be, perhaps, the MOST difficult of all of the areas for men – the opening line.

OPENERS:

I’m sure you’ve been in this situation before: You see a pretty girl, and start walking over to her, then FREEZE when you realize that you have NOTHING to say to her!

It’s frustrating, to say the least.

Well, here’s some good news. What I wrote earlier about the nonverbal part being more important than the verbal part of flirting? It still holds true here.

In fact, the best general opener is, often times, lines that can easily be recognized as openers!

Say if you just were to say “Nice weather we are having, huh?” It’s pretty obvious what you are up to. Now, if the other party is interested, the response should be positive regardless.

This can help take some pressure off you, and give you an idea of how to interpret your success. By trying to be clever, or indirect, you might just wasting time on trying to pull off a great “performed” opener.

How you say the opener will once again ring as more important than the content. If you intone the weather question as a true interrogative, well, that might just sound funny. Stating it as a statement is far more direct and shows assuredness.

The response will let you know how successful you were. It sounds elementary, but it always begs questions. Positive, open responses show that she wants to continue. One word, monotone answers don’t bode well. No answer is worse. If you get those, move on.

Making a comment about the weather is useful for outdoors. If you are inside, find something that you can make a comment about. Use your imagination for this. Is it hot in there? Crowded? Empty? Simple observations are easy enough.

Essentially, you want to make an observation about what is going on, etc.. Now, this isn’t the only way to open, but from experience I can tell you it’s fairly easy and doesn’t require you to pull off a joke. For more variations on how to do this, be sure to check out my website.

It’s also quite standard. People know it and are used to such a thing. It’s not intrusive or threatening so it can easily. It’s not demanding either – it allows the woman a way out.

Now, if you were to pose it as actually demanding an answer, like “What do you make of this weather?”, it puts her a bit on the spot. She doesn’t want to be rude, nor does she want to e roped in. And that question demands an in depth answer, so essentially that is what you are doing.

Some social contexts allow for more variations – a sporting event is an example, as well as hobbies, business, school. You can comment on those things, asking the woman what she thinks of the situation, the team, etc.. Just use the interrogative formula above, and it becomes rather easy.

The varying answers to the question indicate how she is responding to you. The positive response, nonverbally, will be coupled with some verbal cues: personalization, length of response, and questioning.

With length, watch to see how long a response you get from her – if it’s the same length or longer, that’s a good sign. Shorter, coupled with negative body language, is generally bad.

In personalization, she’ll use the word “I” or “me” in the sentence, is another good sign – such as “Yes, I think they’ll win it all this year.” is good – she’s willing to engage in the line of questioning.

On top of the personalization, she might respond with it, AND in the interrogative form. This is saying “please continue to talk”. For example, if asked about the weather, she might say “It is dreary! I thought it would clear up by the afternoon. What have you heard?” This is a wonderful sign, as she’s fully engaged with you.

Most of the time, when such an exchange happens, people dismiss it as just a polite exchange, when in fact it can be so much more. It’s a friendly invitation to open conversation – and by knowing this, you’ll have that leg up from the other guys out there that I mentioned!

The above lines have nothing clever about them. Very simple, time tested and effective. So what about other lines you see bandied about? They ARE useful, but also advanced. They rely on you being able to gauge her response correctly, which takes time. As I mentioned before, check my website for more information on the usage of such lines.

One mistake to avoid: opening up the conversation with some sort of flirtation. It’ll come across as a cheesy line and that’s not good!

Observe the effects that these simple opening sentences have on women. After awhile it will become easy!